IAS officer gives 12 tips on how to raise well-rounded children
It is a world of competition, and it is not easy for parents to raise their kids. For the all-round development of a child, the efforts of parents are required. Nowadays, it’s not all about academics, but the kids’ abilities are measured with high standard tests. Along with education, a child’s talents and skills are equally important. Well-rounded development covers an individual’s physical, emotional, and psychological well-being.
AS Officer Divya Mittal, who is currently posted as the District Magistrate in Uttar Pradesh’s Sant Kabir Nagar, recently tweeted a list of tips to raise well-rounded children.
The tips and tricks the IAS Officer shared are:
1. Tell them they can do anything:
Tell them they can do anything.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Tell it so often that they start believing it. That belief will define their destiny
2/n
When children believe the sky’s the limit, their can-do attitude permeates in all spheres of their lives. This allows them to succeed even when others don’t believe in their ability, thereby enhancing their self-confidence and drive to seek new experiences.
2. Let them fall:
Let them fall.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Let them jump and play and fall and get hurt. Don't jump in to pick them up. Only then will they learn to get up from a failure, dust themselves up and keep walking
3/n
The most important lesson the child needs to learn is to deal with failure. There is always a risk of failure in attempting something new, but the failure is always temporary, and it should not discourage him from trying again.
3. Compete:
Compete
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Make them participate in competitions. They will not win every time. But they will become comfortable with failure. Fear of failure is a bigger hindrance in success than failure.
4/n
When children compete, it urges them to accept challenges, which improves their creativity and problem-solving skills. They will not win every time, but this will help them to face failure, which is a significant hindrance on the path to success.
4. Let them take Risks:
Let them take risk.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Monitor them but allow them to do things you feel can be somewhat risky. Adventure sports, climbing a tree. You will see that when they know they can get hurt in the process, they behave responsibly
5/n
It’s natural to want to keep your child safe, but the chance of injuries may be worth it if, in exchange, one gets emotional and physical confidence. It is believed that having the opportunities and permission to venture into new things can help them to grow and learn.
5. Abundance Mindset:
Abundance mindset.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
They have opportunities & resources that you never had. Let them use that as a jump board to go in the higher orbit. Don't impose your scarcity mindset on them
6/n
The world is consistently changing, and what worked for the parents won’t work for the kids. What that calls for, more than anything, is not an outdated formula for getting ahead but a flexible mindset that allows for many possibilities and can quickly adapt to change.
6. Be a Role Model:
Be a role model
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Be yourself what you tell them to be. Nothing breaks a child's heart more than seeing hypocrisy of their parents
7/n
Children learn best from their parents, and if you act as a role model for your child, it may help shape your child’s future positively.
7. Shun Bad Behaviour:
Shun bad behaviour.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
You must scold them & correct them when they are doing something bad. They need to understand what right behaviour is
8/n
It is vital to nip bad behaviour in the bud when kids are still young. If you get your child used to acting surly, disrespectful or defiant and then try to correct these behaviours when they are reaching adolescence, it’s a lot tougher to turn that around.
8. Trust them:
Trust them.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Don't be disappointed in them. Always have hope. If you become disappointed in them, they will have no hope for themselves.
9/n#parenting
Always show your children that you trust them, and by recognising and empathising with your child, you are teaching them that no matter what they do, you will always be there for them.
9. Give experiences:
Give experiences.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Give them a variety of experiences to open their minds and hearts. Take them to orphanages, dance shows, travel, museums. Wherever you go, talk to them about things and their experience. Don't just be busy amongst yourselves
10/n
Give your kids experiences rather than things; these are the memories they will retain as they get older. In fact, they will be happier fishing, exploring museums or getting some outdoor experiences rather than buying toys.
10. Listen:
Listen.
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Don't assume that they are stupid and don't know things. Don't be in a hurry to respond. Listen intently and then speak. Then you will reach them. You will never have a complaint that they don't listen.
11/n
It is said that listening to your child makes it more likely that they listen to you as well. Parents should listen without fixing, without judgement and with no distraction so that children can form and articulate what they are thinking. By actively listening, you show them what they say is important to you, building your child’s confidence.
11. Don’t Compare:
Don't compare
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Don't compare your child with anyone. Especially with their siblings. Being the favoured one will make them unprepared for harshness of the world, being the unfavoured one will make them needy and always seeking validation
12/n
All parents dream of seeing their children succeed in all endeavours but don’t realise that it can’t be achieved by comparing kids. They feel that comparing can enhance children’s learning and skills, but on the contrary, it affects their confidence level negatively.
12. Be their Safe Place:
Most important:
— Divya Mittal (@divyamittal_IAS) August 23, 2022
Be their safe place. Where they get love without having to be anything. Tell them that you will always love them, even if you are angry with them. Your love is not conditional on any behaviour of theirs.
13/n
Children look for their parents to get love and support. Parents should acknowledge the child’s feelings. Responding to the child with empathy and compassion shows care, and when the child knows that he will get love without judgement, he would be more likely to open up and feel safe to be with you.